A Funny Story

So I’m in my apartment playing Borderlands on my roommate’s X-Box 360. And this man walks directly passed my window. I only caught a glimpse of him and it sounded like he was dragging something though the leaves outside. My first thought, no joke, is “That could have been a Zombie!” It was several moments later he lumbered by again almost without warning wearing a surgical mask. Almost as if he was worried about some disease. Again my zombie worries spiked. I then created a plan right there and then. Because if he had noticed me; he would come thought that big window in the living room. I decided that if I was attacked I’d drop my game controller and grab my roommates broadsword that was less than 5 feet away. It was made for him, and my roommate’s like twice my size, so it’s a big and heavy broadsword. Now I could have stopped there with my plan of how to deal with this possible zombie, but years of practice has taught me that I need to know each of my moves before I strike. So I thought of the most efficient way to kill it. Assuming it comes though the window I could get at an angle and bring the sword down on its arms or head if I’m lucky, then I could thrust though it’s middle or just shove it back outside. Doing so would give me time to go get my lighter sword that is made more for my combat style. And to put on my chainmail. However, it turned out the man that scared me was just a landscaper spraying chemicals on the plants. Thankfully not a zombie/infected!

Two things you can learn from this: One, you should always use a weapon you’re comfortable with; anyone can swing a sword, but not everyone can use it with skill. Second, I chose armor; chainmail makes it very difficult to me bitten, clawed, or pierced by anything. I also chose it because it’s decently light and maneuverable. The only disadvantage I would have is I’d be unable to wear my glasses with the chainmail, however I have so much practice fighting without my glasses, that I wouldn’t be slowed by it.

So to paraphrase: practice with a weapon, have some armor (even makeshift), and practice situations where everything that can go wrong does (i.e. not being able to see). So be prepared.

Keep safe, kids.
The Tactician